i didnt know why i skip it today, or maybe i do.
it was the fear i had, i guess deep down i always knew i would.
maybe it wasnt such a big deal to others, but it was to me.
always has been, maybe always will be.
the idea just stuck with me the whole time even before i signed up.
at times like this i hate myself.
for being so weak, for the need for someone to push me, for being a failure.
i knew guilt follows right after that,
but people always tend to choose the easy way out, dont we?
we made decisions we knew we will regret after, but we still do.
it's life's one big irony.
i think i need a stronger will.
sigh, i need a getaway, a long one.
feeling too much ridiculous anger nowadays, for reasons i dont even know myself.
feel like mia-ing.
probably a week?
it was the fear i had, i guess deep down i always knew i would.
maybe it wasnt such a big deal to others, but it was to me.
always has been, maybe always will be.
the idea just stuck with me the whole time even before i signed up.
at times like this i hate myself.
for being so weak, for the need for someone to push me, for being a failure.
i knew guilt follows right after that,
but people always tend to choose the easy way out, dont we?
we made decisions we knew we will regret after, but we still do.
it's life's one big irony.
i think i need a stronger will.
sigh, i need a getaway, a long one.
feeling too much ridiculous anger nowadays, for reasons i dont even know myself.
feel like mia-ing.
probably a week?
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