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have you ever get the feeling that you have to say something to fill in the silence when you are sitting in a group?

i used to hate talking in a big group.
because when all eyes suddenly fall on me, the words on the tip of my tongue vanish and my joke strangely dont seem as funny to me as a moment ago.
so i prefer to listen and observe in a group.
i used to seek for signs from people's faces to convince myself that they are enjoying themselves.
most often these signs are laughters or smiles.
so i end up cracking my brains for something to lift the mood.
but i learnt that these are not the way to be.
'cause it's too tiring when you care too much about all the others but yourself.
and hey, i found out today that people can still be really enjoying themselves though their expressions dont show it.

2 days or less till school starts.
i've been going out consecutively since the holidays started.
while my teachers' words kept popping up at the back of my mind.
then i'll say to myself "Just another day, and I'll study tmr. Definitely."
HA, but that all ended up as words, just words, empty words.
my study plan is long over before it even got planned.
well, at least i got my mind a week off, or two days more.
and i ticked off some of my desired goings.
now it's back to studying.
come back, come back all my physics, chem, econs, maths facts and gp inspirations.
come back to my brain and reside in there till the As are over.

it's always till the end that people try so hard to cherish.

p.s: oh right, and training last sat felt good. i feel like gng again tmr but there's no more. & i wanna watch ttw but i'm broke ttm.

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