things go wrong in not one or two, but in bundles.

i guess i knew my day was gna go wrong right in the morning.
although i had the long wanted breakfast with dad before work, a call in the morning just tipped off the whole day on the wrong side.
so the day just got worse and worse with the ripple of bad news.
the feeling in between the time of finding out something and taking the time to digest it sucks.
my mind just comes out blank, like the machine that hangs.
i need time to process, i think my brain works slower when i'm sick.
the feeling of knowing something bad is gng to happen also sucks.
it's like.. like you are anticipating to be scolded, it's just wrong.
feeling all headache-y, i feel like putting everything on hold.
i've got a long list of to-do list behind the back of my head which i can't recall now.
i feel like gng on holiday NOW, like fly there right now.

maybe that had been a sign to rest and focus on other bigger problems.
i was feeling angry and sad at the same time.
maybe it's too sudden.
maybe i'm just sensitive to the word last.
maybe i'm just too sentimental.
maybe i'd hold back my tears.
at that particular moment, i felt a strange sense of deja vu.
sometimes i still do wonder if it's because i just ain't good enough.

maybe i just need a day to wallow in self pity.