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i was thinking maybe it's time for me to do some self reflection.
'cause there's the constant same old thoughts going through my head whenever i'm catching a breather or whenever i'm stoning.
honestly, this year has been so busy and stressful that i realise i've been neglecting the people and the things happening around me.
what caused me to realise this, is actually that i realised i forgot a close friend's birthday only after a month after his birthday.
i was so self absorbed in my own world and problems that i didnt take note of my surroundings.
i just looked back at the entries of the past three months and basically i was so self obsessed due to three things or actually one thing: coping with orientation, school work and at the same time being terribly sick.
seriously, i felt like i was dying that time, having your health constantly deteriorating for a month or more while i was so stressed about my school work.
having headaches everyday no matter how much i slept, usually little.
honestly, i was so stressed a few weeks ago that i kept skipping sch to make up for my work but in the end using the time to catching up my sleep.
i was dreading school, and the classmates wasnt helping.
i havent ever felt this terrible in my life.
bad days are more than happy days.
the most i got are okay days.

for the past few months, school work is constantly my top piority and i guessed i neglected my friends.
i dont know what's happening in their lives.
only to find out later through other means.
i admit i havent been a good friend lately.
& i'm sorry to everybody.
& thankyou to those who helped me out during my difficult times.
i appreciate it. :D

i meant it when i said i want to be low profile this year.
i was never good with one-to-one friendships.
& i feel like i always float around without a permanent island, and that is pretty sad sometimes.
'cause you never know where you belong to.
and i tend to always keep a distance.

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